Therapy session

So today after lots of yellow paint splattering the kitchen walls I went to collect some of my belongings from Bernards. It was quite upsetting but i tried to not let it show.
I then went to see my therapist as part of my recovery. I see him twice a month as I pay for the sessions myself and not through the NHS as it was a much faster way of accessing the support I needed.
The main thing we discussed was how I had discovered that I had been inadvertedly been slowly torturing the person that I love most in the world. It was quite an upsetting session as I struggled to come to terms with how I had treated him. I soon realised that they way I was behaving was unfair and far from acceptable behaviour. I cried as I discussed how we had fallen in love and how we seemed to bring out the best in each other and how I felt he completed me. My therapist could see I was distressed and noted how hard it was for me and how hurt and upset I was that we had split. I struggled to come to terms with how I could ever make it up to Bernard as I didnt think I ever could.  He said the first step to overcoming the problem was accepting how I had behaved.  I felt better after discussing it and hopefully this is a step in the right direction.
Overall this has been a tiring day with all the painting and crying!! On the up!

DSP