On the up

So this week has been quite busy and i'm a bit tired out, hence no recent posts!

This evening I went to see my therapist. I felt that I didnt really have much to talk about as my life seems to be getting back on track, i'm communicating with my family more, i'm building up my social life and schedule more, i'm doing well at work other than being tired out.

I feel like the dark cloud that was once permanently in my sky has shifted and gone south. I feel like I can laugh off the bad things that happen ( today at work was a prime example of me laughing something off when I could have just fallen to pieces!). I feel like I am now more able to stand up for myself and tell people when i'm not happy to do something. I feel more able to be on my own and be happy. I know that I will have ups and downs and that this is just the start of the rest of my life but i feel really positive about it.

The only part of my life that i'm not completely happy with is my relationship with Bernard. We aren't currently talking and I miss him so much. I feel like I have lost a large part of my life. I know it will take time to rebuild our relationship as friends before even considering anything else but I just hope he knows that if he needs me I am here for him. I know that things will never go back to being as they were but as Bernard says 'you never know what will happen in the future'. He is wrong. I know i'm never going to allow myself to become as depressed as I was. I'm going to continue to rebuild my life and watch out for the warning signs of me becoming ill again. I'm not going to allow people to take advantage of me. I'm going to stand up for myself.

What will be will be

DSP